The Bajoran Housewife

Quiver-Full

2008-08-07T08:36:14Z

I just wanted to share with you the fact that, since my husband is not a believer, although we agreed at the outset to have a large family, he changed his mind and has completely 'put his foot down' and won't allow us to have another child.

I'm not posting with the intention of complaining about my husband, just really out of a kind of desperation. After five years of waiting, hoping and praying he would change his mind to no avail, this desire to have more children is still so painfully strong and won't just go away on it's own, and my husband's mind is resolutely against it.

I have run a group for several years called the UK "Quiver-Full" fellowship, the word "Quiver-Full" coming from Psalm 127:3-5

"Lo, children are a heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them."

It's designed to be a place of support and encouragement for those who are allowing the LORD to determine their family size and spacing, and those who are seriously considering this monumental decision.

When believers think of the spiritual armour Paul speaks of in Ephesians 6 (and it's worth cross-referencing with Isaiah 59), one 'weapon' that is generally not considered is "arrows" - most of the armour and weaponry we're used to fighting with is intended for close combat, but actually, our blessed little arrows are intended for long-range fighting. Have you ever wondered about why the enemy is waging such a desperate, prolonged and appallingly wicked onslaught against children (not just abortion, but all the things that even believers take on board - the myths of over-population, the lie that children of believers don't belong to the LORD, the lie that children are a burden instead of a blessing)? It's because he knows something we don't seem to know - that the next generation of believers are the next generation of the warriors of the LORD, his enemy.

I don't honestly know what our Abba's plan is for us, and I hardly know what to pray for anymore. I just know that the heartbreak of being denied something that I have desired so strongly for so long is more than I can bear, so if my husband won't change his mind, I wish the desire would subside.

Homemaking Degree

2008-06-25T17:40:01Z

I was surfing today looking for homemaking blogs, and I stumbled across a blog which mentioned that a US college had instituted a degree in homemaking., so I just had to investigate! It's offered at The College at Southwestern which seems to be a fairly liberal Christian Seminary (I may be wrong about the liberal part though!)

Division of Homemaking

HMK 2101 Orientation to Homemaking
This introductory course provides an overview of the field of homemaking, its place in history, and biblical perspective. To be taken the student’s first semester.
One hour

HMK 3103 Biblical Model for the Home and Family
Focus on the Biblical role of women related to the home, family, church, ministry, and relationships.
Three hours

HMK 3113 Nutrition
Focuses on the fundamentals of nutrition, nutrition through the life cycle, brief overview of food preparation, and meal management.
Three hours

HMK 3203 Value of a Child
A study of the spiritual, physical, emotional and cognitive development of a child.
Three hours

HMK 3204 Meal Preparation with Lab
A study and practice of the basic principles of the selection and preparation of food. Nutrition is a pre-requisite.
Four hours

HMK 4101 Senior Seminar
Focuses on putting fundamental elements of homemaking into practice. This course is to be taken as a pre-requisite to the Homemaking practicum and should be taken the first semester of the student’s final year.
One hour

HMK 4103 Basics of Design
Introduces the student to design and includes colors, space, interior design, and a brief overview of clothing construction.
Three hours

HMK 4201 Homemaking Practicum
Focuses on putting fundamental elements of homemaking into practice while placing the students in real life situations. This course serves as the capstone course of the program and should be taken the student's final semester.

HMK 4204 Clothing Construction with Lab
A study of patterns, fabric, equipment, and sewing. Basics of Design is a prerequisite.
Four hours

I think it's really good that it's offered, and encouraging that homemaking is being presented as a worthy career, but I do wonder whether this degree will actually prepare women for the calling of motherhood, homemaking and being a wife. I'd really like to see the reading list and textbooks and compare it with, for example, the TOD-KAH curriculum (Training our Daughters to be Keepers at Home) which is very thorough and comprehensive and written from a conservative perspective.

Urban Homemaker's Challenge - Update

2008-06-19T23:02:32Z

When I took up this challenge, I wasn't very optimistic really about making any progress: I grew up in a super-modern 70's home where all food came out of a packet, space-age style.

But over the last few weeks I've actually been quite pleased with what we've achieved.

We've started drinking raw (unpasteurised) milk again. Husband - who I shall name henceforth as 'Harvey' whether he likes it or not, since he can't think up a sensible screen-name for himself - wasn't too keen on the idea, (a lot of people screw their noses up at the idea of 'live' milk or yoghurt) which is why we didn't do it for long when we tried it before, but I think that I have to take 'small steps' in changing his mind, so rather than overwhelm him with a fridge exclusively full of the raw stuff, I'm just supplementing our usual supply of pasteurised.

I managed to source a relatively inexpensive manual juicer and a flour mill, which both arrived today, and so we spent the morning juicing every fruit and vegetable in site. The children thought this was the most fun, and I was really encouraged because they were actually willing to try what they'd made! We also milled our first batch of flour (I have both wheat and spelt to play with). We did try to make a cake using our wholemeal flour, but it wasn't terribly successful - I think that will take some practice. We have even tried wheatgrass today. It's a bit of an aquired taste, even mixed with the recommended pear juice, but I hear it's just so nutritious that I'm thinking of starting to grow my own.

I've been sprouting seeds for the last couple of weeks and the first batch was really fantastic, which encouraged me to experiment with different types of seeds, but I haven't had quite so much success with the second batch so far. But again, the children (who are not generally very good at making healthy choices in their diets) were very keen to try them.

I've started my first batch of live yoghurt today (I'm just going to check how it's got on when I finish up on here).

And finally, I've ordered a kombucha starter and a kefir culture, and I'm waiting for them to arrive.

I haven't done too much home cooking yet, but to be fair, we've been eating lots of raw foods and salads for summer, so we'll see how that goes. On the whole, I'm really pleased with the direction we're going in.

Housework To Do List

2008-06-09T18:33:33Z

Good morning! Though actually it is already afternoon here and I haven't got much done. We had another busy weekend so the house looks completely crazy. I think making a list of things 'to do' is really helpful - the days I do that I get much more done. (If you aim at nothing you reach that real easy....)

Well, I did get some hoovering done downstairs, cleared the kitchen and run the dishwasher, but there's so much more to do, if I hadn't been so aimless I think I would have got more done.

So my monday afternoon (and probably running over to the rest of the week now) list today looks something like this:

- Take the children out to the park to make the most of the nice day
- Schoolwork
- hoover upstairs
- Take the clean laundry upstairs, sort, fold and distribute
- help the children with their bedrooms (they're all a bit challenged in the tidying department)
- 15 minutes of sorting clutter downstairs
- Get some sewing done
- Phone my friend Tieja to arrange coffee for tomorrow.

Lukewarm and Worldly?

2008-06-09T10:16:52Z

Here we go again... I received the most bizarre and out-of-the-blue e-mail, headed "I don't know what to do with our friendship" which I copy below with my replies. I'm quite shocked to be accused of being worldy and lukewarm. To be honest, my struggles (and all of us have them) have nothing to do with either "worldliness" or "lukewarmness"! I'm wondering what exactly it was about my playlist which offended? It's mostly classical music.:

[FROM MY FRIEND TO ME:]

Hi, not quite sure what to do with our friendship

I respect that you are Messianic, but I sensed that
your abit of a dabbler with worldly stuff including
our first email

Now you are on a few of my Ning networks and
to tell you the truth your playlist is abit worldly
for me. I will do nothing for now

I could give you code to put my messianic playlist
on your ning profiles.

If things dont change I'll have to remove you

Sorry for saying

Shalom
[Name withheld]

You should read Rev 3:14-21

[MY REPLY:]

Dear [name]

You must make your own judgements. Certainly you must judge for yourself between right and wrong.

But to be honest, for you to judge my *heart* as being lukewarm and worldy is way off.

It always saddems me to discover the same kind of judgementalism in the messianic movement as I left behind in christianity,rather I would expect and hope for support and encouragement and thankfully that seems to be the norm on the Torah path, but I sensed from you very early that you were in need of healing.

Perhaps you should read Matthew 7 and I Corinthians 10:12.

Shalom
Shoshana

p.s. if and when you are ready to make teshuvah I will be there and ready to support and encourage you.

[MY FRIEND'S REPLY TO ME:]

I am sorry it is plain and simple that your playlist is worldly
none of those songs will not be hinted on being sungin the
KINGDOM. If you think so you are fooling yourself

I can not link to your playlist.

Just face up to reality

I dont want an argurment here its just reality

My original stance stands
If nothing changes Ill have to remove you

Shalom
[Name withheld]

I cant wait I have to remove you
your in complete denial

and I cant link to your playlist
anyfurther. I gave you suggestions
but you just turned this into an
argument

I will you well
Shalom
[Name Withheld]

[AND MY FINAL REPLY]

Dear [Name]

You are mistaken my friend. There was no argument from my side.
Feel free to remove me as a friend from all networks, that is your perogative.

But read Matthew 7, I Corinthians 10:12 and Romans 14:4 again. Mercy rejoices over judgement. HaShem alone is my judge. The kingdom is more that music and computer networks.

I pray only that your eyes will be opened and you will make teshuvah before it is too late.

As I said, if and when you are ready, I will be here to support and encourage you, and not judge you.

Shalom.

I'm surprised, shocked, and a little confused................

and having just re-read the whole thing, this is what really makes me laugh:

" I could give you code to put my messianic playlist
on your ning profiles."

Give me a break! I would be annoyed, If it wasn't so laughable and ridiculous. How do you deal with people like this? It makes me sad and angry, because this person knows virtually nothing about me - he's judging me on my music but he knows nothing of my real life. And for all he knows I could be a brand new believer, new to the Hebrew roots, fragile and delicate and all it would take to destroy my faith could be a little rejection - it has happened so many times to so many people I know. Let's be a little bit more merciful, kind, gentle and understanding of each other and our weaknesses! And let's restore each other gently where necessary.

The Simple Woman's Daybook

2008-06-03T10:48:37Z

My friend Kathryn (the bookworm) introduced me to the Simple Woman's Daybook meme, and I thought I would give it a go today:

http://thesimplewoman.blogspot.com/

Check out The Simple Woman for links to other Daybooks and instructions if you want to add your own.

Outside My Window... it's grey and drizzling. Actually it looks very lush and green out there, I may get everone into their wellies and go out for a splosh in the puddles.

I am thinking...that I should really finish up on the computer and gather everyone into the living room and start school now.

I am thankful for... relative peace in the house this morning! A roof over my head, plenty of food, family, friends, car, all that I need. To have a dishwasher!

From the kitchen...DS has loaded the dishwasher without complaining this morning so all I need to do is tidy up. Oh, and hoover (now that I check, there's quite a lot of work to do in there :-(

I am wearing... a pink t-shirt and black jogging bottoms, (and bright orange socks).

I am creating... I'm not being very creative at the moment. I might start another scarf (my forte is chunky knitted scarfs using 2 different yarns - one thick and one thin, in co-ordinating colours - it makes a lovely effect). I'm also wondering about making some clothes for my daughter because it's so hard to find modest clothes for girls. But the price of material is so horrendous, that I'm contemplating making some kind of hippy-looking rag-quilt type clothes from scraps. (Is there a proper name for that?)

I am going...to ballet this afternoon (well not me, my daughter). I'm rather relieve there's no other activities to worry about any more for a Tuesday... but there's a possibility of a Hebrew lesson this evening. I'm waiting to hear.

I am reading...a huge pile of books! See yesterday's entry! The fiction title on the list is "Lucca" by Jens Grondahl.

I am hoping...that school will be a bit more successful today. I'm not actualy feeling too well (I think I'm fighting something off, and I have toothache) and I don't want to fight with the children again today.

I am hearing... happy noises from the children playing upstairs, the whirr of the computer's fan, and now the gentle hum of the dishwasher.

Around the house...lots of houseplants without a home (they had been moved into the garden for the summer, but the summer has given up a bit so they had to come in again while the weather is so cold and miserable.

One of my favorite things... bookshops and libraries which also allow you to drink coffee (how very civilised)! We first discovered this concept in Sweden when we lived in Stockholm - especially Lidingo library which remains one of my very favourite places. But failing that, Borders is pretty good.

A Few Plans For The Rest Of The Week: actually nothing much on the agenda this week, just Ballet this afternoon, and Girls' Brigade on Thursday evening, but I'm looking forward to seeing my Swedish/Finnish friend Tieja for coffee at Ikea next week. I might take a walk into town if the weather clears up, perhaps take the children to a park.

Here is picture thought I am sharing...

Manic Monday

2008-06-02T20:48:24Z

Shavua Tov!

This was my To-Do list for today:

* Hoover downstairs (somebody, who shall remain nameless, has spillt rabbit food behind the kitchen curtain and forgotten to mention it to me...)
* Tidy the hallway (and get the children to tidy their video shelf which is in the hallway)
* Clear the stairs (we've rearranged furniture and I have a sofa seat which needs to go up)
* Sort the laundry
* Hoover upstairs
* Homeschool
* Manage to get to Boys' Brigade on time!

Well, despite starting the day off with prayer and being really positive and determined, the whole thing had completely fallen apart by lunch-time. I wonder sometimes whether starting the day with prayer equals entering battle (spiritual-warfare-type).

Out of the above list, I barely managed to check off 'homeschool' and 'manage to get to Boys' Brigade on time'.

I'm off to bed early to get down to some serious reading (check out my Multiply blog if you're interested in the titles.) http://lillbjorne.multiply.com/journal/item/142/Another_Huge_Pile_of_Books_on_My_Bed-side

Better tomorrow, I hope.

Shabbat Shalom!

2008-05-30T01:52:30Z

Shalom, alichem!

I hope you all have had a great week.

I just thought I would take this opportunity of wishing you all a lovely weekend and a shalom-filled shabbat.

I'm going to be offline now until after shabbat, simply because I've allowed the internet to eat up too many of my hours this week. (I also need to actually do so home-making, and especially work hard to meet my challenge deadline of cleaning my fridge before Shabbat!)

Please don't feel that you can't post on the Messianic Keepers at Home Network on shabbat, by the way. I'm tending towards viewing the network as a "fellowship", so provided you're not posting in the marketplace, I don't feel that you're violating Torah. It's up for discussion (as are all the draft 'rules' I've posted!) but certainly for now I leave it to you to personally make a judgement.

Looking forward to learning more with you next week.

Every blessing to you!

In Yeshua,

x
Shoshana
x

A Christian Home

2008-05-30T00:25:51Z

I just thought I would add a link to a nice Christian homemaking site. There seem to be lots of resources here, plus it's ever so pretty! :)

http://www.achristianhome.org/

Just look at all the stuff they cover there (sorry about all those darn links, I couldn't work out how to turn them off)!:

Motherhood & Parenting Letters to My Sisters Titus2 Journey Study
Modest Feminine Attire   Letters to Mothers
Woman To Woman The Welcome Home Messages    Christian Life Issues

Child Training   Pregnancy & Childbirth   Adoption The Great Page

Good Things & Recipes Letters    pamela's writings

Replies To Women's Letters    Our RECIPES Bible-Quiet time Missions

The Hope Chest Hymns & Quotes   Kathryn's Letters

Messages To Young Ladies Home Church

Sandy's Home Notes Low Carb Top Ten To Do's Chocolate!

Good Things Just for Young Ladies   Diet & Weight Loss

Nutrition Health - Food Value   Medical Info Page Conception Prayer Requests

Pregnancy List  Ministries to Women Courtship Weddings Large Family IssuesToday Bookshelf   Bible Resources &Theology    Devotionals

Glenys's writings -   Prodigals and Waywards - Post Abortion Hope - Past sexualabuse

Home Schooling Teaching Children Greeting Cards - Notable Quotes -

Far Above Rubies   Just For Men Marriage  Dates

Just For Young Men Sewing & Crafts Holidays Homemaking

Grandmothers Gardening Various & Sundry links Simple Living Games & Rules Neat Stories

Funny Funny   Gifts to Make     Home Management

Wow! It's a real temptation to spend all my homemaking hours online...

Shabbat Shalom!

2008-05-23T11:48:36Z

Shalom ladies! (and our one gentleman!)

I am so amazed by the interest the Messianic Keepers at Home network has generated - we are less than a week old and already we have 35 members!

Thank-you to all who have joined and contributed!

I know that this network will be a blessing, and that already some are encouraged (including me!) to work more diligently at the worthy calling of wife, mother and homemaker, thanks to the kindness and willingness of other ladies who are prepared to share their knowledge and experience and also to ask questions in areas we have to learn.

It's not my intention that this network should take time away from your tasks as homemakers, but if you are able to spare a few moments each day, or even half an hour a week encouraging other ladies, we will all be blessed and enabled to bless our families, to the praise of HaShem, Baruch hu!

Those of you with experience might consider becoming administrators of groups (which just means making sure that questions are answered, encouraging discussion or challenges and also enables you to post items such as links, photos, videos etc. to your group's resources box).

I'd also like to draw your attention to the Kosher Recipe Exchange in the forum. It is currently set up in such a way that recipes need to be posted as replies to existing discussions rather than as new discussions - I hope that doesn't cause confusion, but it seemed the easiest way to organise the forum. Please contribute recipes if you can!

And finally, thank-you for a wonderful week on the Messianic Keepers at Home network, and I wish you a very blessed shabbat.

Shabbat shalom!
x
Shoshana
x

Living out Titus 2 'Virtually'

2008-05-22T10:50:30Z

I'm excited about how fast the Messianic Keepers at Home network is growing and pray that we will all bless each other and our husbands and families through it.

Now that there are lots of groups and forum categories and discussions, I won't be able to personally manage every area of the network, so I'm hoping that the ladies will "take charge" a little bit of groups where they have knowledge, experience or expertise, have links to share, books to recommend, etc.

Also, I'm hoping people will speak up and ask questions in groups where they are wanting to learn.

That way, I pray that the Messianic Keepers at Home network will begin to fulfill the mandate in Titus 2 'virtually'.

x
Shoshana
x

Messianic Keepers at Home

2008-05-21T19:38:37Z

I'm leaving Bajor for the time being and coming back down to earth to write a Homemaking blog.

I've started a network on Ning called Messianic Keepers at Home: http://messianickah.ning.com

Here's the blurb:

"The Messianic Keepers at Home network is a place to encourage Messianic women in their roles as wives, mothers and homemakers.

"The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of [YHWH] be not blasphemed."
Titus 2:3-5

Wherever you are on the Messianic spectrum, from Jewish Christian through to Nazarene Israelite or Torah-observant Followers of Yeshua, this is a place to learn and teach in the spirit of Titus 2.

I started this network because of a perceived need for the Titus 2 ministry within the Messianic movement. It is the fruit of a long-time interest and vision. It is my hope and prayer that this network will enable, support and encourage both older women to teach and younger women to learn. May it be a blessing to you all, to your husbands, your children, your parents, the Household of Faith and the wider society in which you live.

Christian and Jewish women are also welcome provided they are not opposed to the Messianic faith.

Not a place to debate theology or scripture, except in love and where it can bless, encourage and edify.

Please behave in a spirit of Chesed (kindness, or 'grace'), love and gentleness at all times. Lashon hara (unpleasant speech in any form) is not acceptable."

Please come and join us!

Q-Less

2008-05-13T14:23:12Z

When we were having the Ferengis checked out for Autistic-spectrum disorders, we as caretakers of Ferengis were also assessed, and both of us scored very high on both ADHD and Dyspraxia. It was declared that, with our backgrounds, it would be hardly surprising to find that our Ferengis were 'neurologically interestering'.

Sisko has a terrible problem with time-keeping. Oh, he's ok about arriving at work on time. You can train yourself to good habits, after all. But after work, he's all over the place, and it can make for a very frustrating time making arrangements. We've missed a good few transports in our time because Sisko had his head in the clouds.

The way this manifests itself for me is having a tendency to walk into things and be forever bashing myself in the same places, on the same pieces of hardware. I may have been able to set Ops up in a way which helps to avoid injury, but if I don't tread carefully, there are places in Quark's bar, the Promenade and the staff quarters that'll have me covered in bruises on a regular basis. I sometimes feel as though the laws of Physics are actually conspiring against me to ensure I never have a moment's peace.

I don't have enough experience with Odo and Quark to know whether they've inherited these same difficulties, (Quark shows signs of having less of the 'Attention Deficit' side of ADHD but a whole lot of the 'Hyperactivity') but I can already see in Jadzia problems with spatial awareness which lead to constant walking into things and she's usually covered in scratches and bruises (actually, come to think of it, so is Odo, which is probably not a good sign.) But Bashir outshines them all - he seems to have inherited the worst of both mine and Sisko's ADHD and Dyspraxia traits: as well as having a good few challenges of his own, he is regularly falling, tripping, running into things, scraping himself and tumbling over, as well as being completely obvlivious to the concept of time-keeping.

In the context of having to teach the Ferengis myself in the absence of educational facilities on the Station, these neurological differences are proving to be quite a challenge to me. It wasn't too bad when Bashir was young and on his own, because I was able to mold the curriculum to suit him, but now I have 4 students which completely different needs pulling in different directions, I am really beginning to tear my hair out.

I was thinking this morning that actually I should just acknowledge the fact that we're going through a bad patch at the moment, and allow myself to have a bad patch. But unfortunately the condition comes with a tendency towards perfectionism, and when I can't attain perfection, I find myself quite depressed about everything.

It's times like this I wish there were a semi-Divine person around the place, able to click his fingers and make it all right again.

Technical Difficulties with the Station

2008-05-03T13:48:12Z

Well, I thought I had better write my first post, despite the fact that I'm really struggling with all this darn Cardassian technology. It's totally counter-intuitive, and I can't get the hang of it at all so far. Perhaps connecting with Chief O'Brian, or even Elim Garak (who might as a Cardassian have some insight into the technology) would help.

I'm not really in a good place mentally / emotionally / spiritually. I don't like the Station. I don't like my Commander. I don't like the Ferengis. I am dissillusioned with Star Fleet, I'm in exile from Bajor, and somehow I look around to find that my youth has slipped away and I've gotten out of shape. In my current physical state I couldn't even pillow-fight, let along join up with the militia. I've been in this frame of mind for a while, and I don't think it's helping anything or anyone, so I've got to get myself out of it somehow.

Sisko has taken the Ferengis out in the runabout to give me some peace (finally)! Dr. Bashir is off on an away-mission and won't be back for two more days, and Jadzia is off on her own little adventure. So I have the Canteen all to myself which is nice. The Station is quiet which ought to be good but really isn't because all I can hear is my own thoughts rumbling about, accusing me, mocking me and reminding me that my life has taken a turn I didn't plan or anticipate, and I don't know where to go from here.

If only there were a gym or a holosuite here, I could try and get back into shape. I might enlist Quark to lobby Sisko to invest in some facilities (for the morale of all on the Station)... but I know that funds from Star Fleet aren't forthcoming at the moment, and it's not very likely that Sisko would voluntarily go in and face Picard just because I want to lose weight. (((sigh))) I'll have to think of a plan.